For No Sake of Posterity
plunged into sights unseen
a foggy day sets in LA town
sub-conscious, conscious visions
fleeting, wafting into black
desperation. suffocation. congestion. self-annihilation?
fuck patience. fuck virtues.
i pity me.
“go away, bad dream!”
i need to put the bubble in the
jar – for no sake of posterity
Without beating this story like a dead horse, I blew out the retina in my only good eye January 11th while in Los Angeles shooting the short film, PASSER LE SEL S’IL VOUS PLAÎT, adapted from my short play, “Pass the Salt, Please.”. I had the smarts to walk into the Jules Stein Eye Institute at UCLA on the 12th and say, "I believe something's wrong", and was rushed into surgery - which, according to Doc McCannell and Doc Hu – went superbly. However, I’ve been grounded in Cali until the gas bubble in my eye dissipates. (I've been cleared to go home - I'll leave this Monday or Tuesday...by train. For the hell of it.)Thus began my convalescence following post-retina re-attachment surgery – first at the home of my director-friend, Tatjana, near Beverly Hills, and then (where I’m currently at), at the foothills of the Angeles Forest in Tujunga at the home of my goddaughter (Donovan & Maria’s).
During those first recuperative days, I'd often go sit on Tat’s porch. Since I needed to keep my head positioned down 50 minutes out of every hour (and sleep on my stomach) for the first three days (this was reduced to 30 minutes for the next five days), I had to switch things up any way I could think of. Tat was snapping pictures of her son one day and I called her over and asked her to take some pics of me – one or two days post-surgery – with the intention of preserving some record of the state of my present physical and mental well being. These photos are testament to the living hell I endured, as is the above poem.
5 comments:
Jeff! One never knows what one will face, day-to-day - so great that you have good friends surrounding you. Wishing you all-good-health, as you continue your recovery!
Loving thoughts to you Jeff
jeff! I just got your calls. I've guess I've been abandoning all outward communications lately, but we'll speak soon. I was so moved by this post. I hope the train ride is peaceful for you. they usually are. my thoughts are with you!
We take so much for granted every day of our lives until we "see" something like this post. I wish you could have been spared the trauma, but am glad you are going to be OK.
thank you all. really. if you get a chance to see the film, 127 Hours, see it. the plight this man found himself in...i could relate to. it was difficult to watch. the solitude. the darkness. being alone, with not-so-pleasant thoughts.
(i can never remember my google id to sign in with)
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